Showing posts with label books. Show all posts
Showing posts with label books. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

Reading To Grandpa

Grandpa Tom was my maternal grandfather. He was a steely eyed, quarter-blood-Cherokee who’d worked for the Wichita Falls daily newspaper all his life. 
I don’t remember grandpa Tom much before I was six-years-old, when we visited Texas for the summer. He had a favorite chair by the window where he would sit for hours. He had been ill, we children were told, so please be quiet around your grandpa. 
Every morning, mom used to hand me the newspaper and tell me to go over and read to my grandpa. “Show your grandpa how good you can read,” she’d urge. 
“The whole thing?” I’d complain. At first I was a little afraid of grandpa Tom, him being ill and so quiet and stern looking. He used to stare off into space and work his jaws as if he were eating. His fingernails were stained from the printer’s ink, too, which somehow I found upsetting. 
“No, honey,” my mom would reply sweetly, “just read to him until he falls asleep.” 
He fell asleep in his chair all the time. Later I learned that grandpa Tom had been recovering from the first of his many strokes at the time. While we stayed there that summer, I read to him every day, sitting on the leather ottoman at his feet, as he listened quietly and stroked an orange cat who slept in his lap. 
Eventually I forgot my fear and we became friends, grandpa and I. He’d smile crookedly with anticipation in the morning when I came to him with the newspaper.
Later, with great solemnity, he gave me an old, ivory-handled pen knife. “For you,” he sputtered, placing it in my hand. His words were terribly slurred from the stroke. “Don-don-don’t forget… to clean it.”
One day, I put the newspaper down when I thought he was asleep and I started reading to him from one of the books I’d brought with me from California. (Not sure if I could get books in Texas, I’d stuffed my suitcase full of them. “Whataya got in here?” my dad asked as he packed the car for the trip. “Rocks?”) 
What I read to grandpa that day wasn’t a rock. It was James and the Giant Peach, by Roald Dahl. 
“Good!” grandpa said, startling me. I didn’t know he was awake. “More, please,” he added.
All that summer we laughed together at the adventures and misadventures of young James, while we hated and feared the cruel aunts Spiker and Sponge. When Spiker and Sponge deliciously got what they deserved and were crushed by the giant peach, grandpa laughed so hard he upset the cat, tumbling it to the floor with a squealing meow. Grandpa found the story very funny, laughed all the time, which surprised me somehow, and my mother thought was suspicious.
“What are you guys doing in there? Rusty? Dad?” she called. 
“Just reading,” we’d call back, laughing, but it was more than that. 
We were in another world together.  


   “And James Henry Trotter, who once, if you remember, had been the saddest and loneliest boy that you could find, now had all the friends and playmates in the world.”

Ah, Dahl, you magnificent bastard!



Tuesday, December 1, 2015

Letter to Santa

Dear Santa,
It’s been a long time since I wrote. 
You may not even remember me. 
I was the skinny blonde kid living on Wheeler Ave in Lake View Terrace? In the San Fernando Valley out by Hanson Dam and Laurel Canyon? 
I lived there in the 1960s.
Just me and my mom and dad to begin with. 
It being southern California, we didn’t have much of a chimney, so you probably wouldn’t remember that. 
Maybe Santa you remember kids from the presents you give them? 
The first present you ever gave me was a book.
A gift for which I truly thank you.
It was a how-to book about drawing animals. 
Boy! I must have drawn 10,000 horses from that book before I ever saw a live one! Most of these 10,000 horses were pretty poorly drawn I admit, but after about eight or nine thousand they started to get better.
From this book I learned something about myself I never knew before; that I really liked to draw. I used to show my drawings to my mother when her headaches weren’t too bad. Usually she didn’t feel good and would look at me with big shiny eyes and say, “Please Rusty. Some other time, okay? I’ve got a headache.” 
So I left her alone as much as I could.
Maybe you keep track of this stuff Santa, because everyone says you know naughty from nice and even keep a list, so I suppose you know my mother passed away a little bit before the next Christmas.
Which the grownups said was a blessing. 
I guess that’s true, but she wasn’t their mother.
That was the Christmas you didn’t come.
1960. Remember?
Did you think we’d all been naughty?
I was living with different aunts and uncles that holiday season while my father got better. He was in hospital with the DT’s whatever that is I didn’t know but I overheard aunt Tootsie say it to the milkman while they had a cigarette in the kitchen.
They’d come out of the bedroom, her and the milkman, laughing and playful as children, while he tucked his shirt into his trousers and she straightened her hair.
Then she called my father some terrible names, thinking I couldn’t hear.
The milkman laughed and said too bad, some guys can’t take it.
Yeah she answered, and now I’m stuck with his brat!
Never mind, Santa, I understand you not making it that year. 
It’s difficult to visit a family that isn’t a family anymore.
Besides, what I wanted was impossible. I know that now. 
How could you bring back my mother?
But things got better, like they always do.
You brought me a blue and yellow remote-controlled robot in 1962 that was so wonderful I still remember it to this day! It rolled on treaded wheels and was powered by batteries and out of its head would shoot little spring-loaded missiles!
I shot them at my new stepmother, saying look isn’t it great! but she hardly noticed.
She didn’t care for little children or robots, she said.
I named my robot Asimov, after the writer. 
I used to imagine Asimov talking to me when I was lonely and helping me with my homework when I was dumb.
Sometimes I imagined him blowing-up my stepmother.
Alas! Asimov fell into the pool and short-circuited one day during a battle with the neighbor’s cat.
Then Santa next Christmas you gave me a football and a helmet and a jockstrap and my dad thought they were great presents and he played with me a lot for awhile. That was a wonderful time until my dad saw that I was useless at sports and really I’d rather read a book or draw a bird in a tree than catch a ball or block a linebacker. 
I could see he was disappointed.
He called me a little sissy but I don’t think he really meant it.
I think he was still sad about mom dying, and this made him a bit mean sometimes.
Then the next year Santa you brought me a bicycle. 
I didn’t have it very long because I forgot and left the garage door opened and it got stolen!
In broad daylight!
Plus they took my dad’s golf clubs and some other stuff. 
Boy! was my dad ticked off!
Well, there goes your xmas, stupid, said my stepmother. That’ll teach you to mind your shit better, she added.
Sorry, I said. (Too bad they didn’t take my football helmet and jockstrap was what I was thinking.)
So instead of riding my bike I made a skateboard with a board and a skate and broke my leg falling off it before New Year’s day arrived.
I learned to my amazement that even the smallest pebble can stop a hurtling skateboard dead in its tracks!
I also learned that a body in motion tends to stay in motion, as I flew through the air after my skateboard had been stopped dead in its tracks. 
I was learning a lot until I landed.
Well, there goes your new years, dummy, said my stepmother when I got out of hospital the next day. Maybe that’ll teach you, she added. But she never said teach me what because she’d turned away and started watching her tv shows by then.
Bring me another drink, stupid, she said without looking at me.
So I hobbled into the kitchen and made her a drink.
She’d taught me to make gin and tonics, with lemon.
Not fucking lime, you idiot! she’d yelled at me when I got it wrong. Then she slapped me a few times to help me remember.
Lime’s for fucking tequila, dumbass! she added.
So I remembered. 
Lemon in her G&Ts.
After four operations in the hospital that year, my leg healed pretty good.
I missed a lot of school, but I don’t limp hardly at all now.
Stupid skateboard.
Or was it the pebble?



To be continued…

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

“All Ashore That’s Going Ashore!”


   “Goodbye!” I called. “Goodbye-eye!” 
   I stood at the rail of the SS Oriana, waving goodbye to America. 
   It was 1967, and I was fourteen-years-old. 
   My family and I were emigrating to New Zealand. 
   I kept waving as I idly scanned the crowd gathered on the pier. I didn’t expect to see anyone I knew. The people who had come to see us off had left long ago. 
   The giant ship would be departing soon. Departing Long Beach bound for Hawaii, Fiji, Tonga, New Zealand. The names both allured and frightened me. I confess I was a little resentful about leaving America, and frightened by the idea of living in a strange land on the other side of the world.
   “All ashore that’s going ashore!” 
   I heard the singsong command and turned from the ship’s rail to see a sailor in a white uniform ringing a brass bell the size of a pineapple, announcing the last call for going ashore.
   “All ashore that’s going ashore!” he repeated. 
   I recall him vividly because as he approached me shaking and clanging his bell, I chanced to hear between clangs the stiff, starched legs of his spotless sailor pants brush against each other with a dull, clapping sound. Clap, clap, clap. A clap with each step he took. It was a small thing that probably nobody else would even notice, but I found it delightfully amusing. Clap, clap, clap went his pants, and I was enchanted. I looked up from the sailor’s musical trousers and into his face.
   I wanted to share my delight in his pants by offering him a big, bright smile. 
   To my complete astonishment, he gave me a look of reproach and hatred. 
   It was a look that said, “What are you grinning at, you stupid boy?” 
   My eyes fell from his face to the ship’s deck. The decking looked like planks of gold in the California sunlight. 
   I was afraid to look up into the sailor’s face. And for this I hated him, for we hate the things we fear. I let my mind wander down a gruesome vein, drawing on scenes from my beloved books and movies to invent magnificent comeuppance for the sailor. 
   Yes, I thought, he would issue that look to the wrong boy one day. Then he’d be sorry! He’d wake up dead in an Opium den down by the docks with a dozen stab wounds in his starchy body. A dozen stab wounds made from a dozen different all-seeing knives! To fall clutching his murderers, not like noble Caesar clutching Brutus in the Senate described by Shakespeare, but like Janet Leigh in the Bates Motel clutching the shower curtain in the movie Psycho envisioned by Hitchcock. A horrible, surprising, lonely death! Ha! Ha! His pants would clap, clap, clap as he twitched in agony! Then to be buried in a nameless pauper’s grave in a cemetery outside the ancient, crumbling city walls. It would be raining dismally, the Monsoon season having begun that day but it wouldn’t matter because no one would come. No one to mourn him, the infidel foreigner in a foreign port. His aged mother back home, alone and forlorn in her rocking chair by the fire, forever haunted by her son’s unknown fate…
   Clap, clap, clap. The sailor’s pants were getting closer!
   Clang! Clang! I heard the bell ring out!
  “ALL ASHORE THAT’S GOING ASHORE!” came the lusty cry!
  Gathering my strength I looked up from the deck of golden planks. I wanted him to see that I wasn’t afraid. I didn’t want to be the little boy he had scared shitless with his sneer. I wanted to meet his eyes head-on! 
   Too late, for he had passed. 
   Passed without a backwards glance. It was as if he didn't even know I was there.  
   With growing relief I watched the sailor march away, the clapping of his pants growing fainter with each step.
   “All ashore that’s going ashore!”